The Porbeni Matriarch
said good night on January 8 2014. I didn't even get to say good bye apart from me calling her on New Year’s Day
promising to spend the weekend with her.
She was my grandmother, such a beautiful woman. A homemaker par excellence! In her honour, I present her as the homemaker
of the month of January.
The very first time I
met her I called her aunty. My
perception of grandmother meant that she had to be old. I met her when she was in her sixties but she
looked so young, there was no way she could be my grandma. So I kept going to my grand-dad’s first wife’s
room thinking she was my grandma. In a
way she was, wasn't she? In case you are
wondering what I am talking about, in my grandma’s time polygamy seemed to be
the order of the day, so my grandma was my grandpa’s third wife and she was by
his side till the end of his life. My
grandparents celebrated their 58th year anniversary in the year I
got married, that was in 2006. I have a
picture of them in my living room and I hold it up as a milestone to beat
should God give us grace to see beyond that time.
Oma, as she was fondly
called which is German for grandma, was a homemaker; it was the norm in her
days. She told me she had wanted to be a
nurse and she would have trained in the United Kingdom but my granddad could
not leave her because there was nowhere to leave his beautiful wife. Even in their old age my Opa did not like to
leave her to go out on her own (smile).
She was a trained seamstress and she upheld very high standards till her
old age. I did not really get to see her
work because by the time I met her she had stopped sewing due to her failing eye
sight. But the indications were there
that she was very good at what she did.
I remember her sending me to her tailor to sew something for her, she
had cut the material already to the length and style she wanted and given
specific instructions on what to do. Now
only someone who knew the trade well could do that. Then she was always looking out for new
styles and checking out what the younger generation was wearing and probably
seeing how she could adapt the styles to her age.
My Oma was fashionable
to the very end of her life. On Saturday
she would have picked out her outfit ready for church the next day; double
wrappers to match the head tie and a lovely blouse to go. Her jewellery as well as her shoes and bag
had to go well with what she wore.
As a person she was
really lovely, loving and caring. She
never forgot a birthday even my children’s birthdays and she always called me
on my wedding anniversary. I remember
when I had my first child, I had him on a Tuesday and she took a cab to my
house on Saturday to see me. She put me
on her lap and cuddled me before she saw the baby (my eyes are welling up with
tears as I write this).
How I miss you so, my
wonderful Oma. When I found out my
daughter had clubfoot, I couldn’t tell her because I knew she would be
worried. She eventually found out and
she really was worried. She was sorry
that I had to go through the whole stress of my daughter’s treatment. However, my daughter started walking in December
2013 and she was overjoyed to see her walk.
The last time I went to spend the weekend with her in December she was
seriously playing with my little children and it was such a heart-warming sight
to see. She had not long before gone for
a cataract removal so she could see them clearly.
My Oma, I miss you so
much and I love you dearly…..
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